"@KimKardashian: I knew all this traveling & no sleep would make me sick :-(" You being famous for gettin fucked on camera makes me sick :-( 2 hours ago
Looks like I finally found my partner for the We Fest Bag Toss Tournament, that is if I can’t get Patrick Kane (see below.) Giroux and I would go ham on anyone, and chicks especially wouldn’t stand a chance having to play in soaking wet panties. Just playin drinkin games with two half-arm casts like it ain’t no thang. Then prolly pounded this duck-faced puck slut in the cornhole like she deserves.
PS Giroux has a lot of catching up to do if he ever wants to get on Patty Kane’s off-season level
You listen here. This here is America, and if Bill wants his goddamn fish, he gets his goddamn fish. Why did he call the police? Because he wasn’t gettin’ what every good American deserves, and that’s his RIGHTS! If ya ask me, the fuckin’ chefs in the kitchen need to get their shit together and be ready for some good ol’ American customers like Bill.
(City Pages) A 16-year-old student at St. Paul’s Como Park High School brought cupcakes to his classmates on May 9. Nice gesture, right? Well, it’s not so nice when you fill one of the cupcakes with semen and the give it to an unsuspecting classmate. And then threaten to burn down the principal’s house after you get suspended for lacing your treats with that most illicit of all fluids. As unbelievable as that all is, it’s exactly what’s gone down the last couple weeks at Como Park High, according to a Pioneer Press report.
The “creamy” cupcake recipient began getting teased by his classmates May 10, the day after he ingested the treat his fellow student gave him. According to St. Paul police spokesman Paul Paulos, the victim’s classmates started asking him, “How he could do that, if it tasted funny, things like that, and he heard someone mention that semen was used in the cupcakes.” The alleged culprit reportedly only targeted one of his classmates for the semen-filled surprise.
Unfortunately, the student had already eaten the cupcake, so it will never be conclusively determined whether the 16-year-old who gave it to him is truly one of the most dastardly teenagers in world history or not. But the rumor itself was enough to prompt school administration to suspend the cupcake distributor, who then took to Twitter and threatened to burn the principal’s house down. The principal reported the threat to police, who haven’t arrested the student but have assigned an investigator to look deeper into the situation.
I’m kind of skeptical as to how this whole situation actually went down. And the fact that the fatty already ate the cupcake means we’ll never know if it was actually filled with semen. However, I see two possible scenarios. Either A. this kid brought in a single cupcake to give to one of the kids he hates who, for some reason, accepts and eats it. “Hey bro my mom baked you this delicious, semen-free cupcake.” Yeah okay how retarded would you have to be to accept suspicious, baked treats from your enemies in the first place. Which brings me to scenario B. the kid brought in a couple dozen cupcakes for the class and just told everyone “no no don’t take that one, that ones Johnny’s!” (Awesome Prank Farva) Either way it seems like it must have worked. And for that we thank you.
PS “According to St. Paul police spokesman Paul Paulos,” LOL GTFO Paul
PPS The kid who ate the cupcake is pretty much in a lose-lose situation here. Because even if he noticed there was semen in his cupcake, he’s pretty much guaranteed to get made fun of for knowing what semen tastes like
This has gotta be the closest thing to porn I’ve ever seen without actually being porn. It’s too early for this shit though, was definitely not prepared for the heat that this video brought. So excuse me while I go change my pants.
Chick fights. What are they good for? Tits. Damn no cheap thrills; guess we’ll have to analyze this as a real fight.
Of course the chicks’ natural reaction is to engage with the hair immediately. No judgment here. Guys tackled Ricky Williams by his hair. This is a street fight, you don’t stop to clarify rules… “Um excuse we, can we make the hair off limits? I just paid $60 for a haircut that costs a man $10.” Guys do the same things… They go for the shirt collar. The real fight comes after the hair/collar grab. Some guys/girls can throw punches or throw ‘em down so you can start wailing. Others just grab it and give a look similar to boy in the showers with Sandusky – no idea what to do now that they’re here, they just know they’ve crossed a line where it’s either fuck or be fucked.
What I’m really looking for is what the girls do after they got the hair. Beanstalk clearly knows what to do. She throws a nice straight punch (0:44), good extension, more East to West than North to South. Props. Ready in Red is the boy in the Sandusky Showers. No idea what she’s doing, just kind of grabbing the hair and twisting the Beanstalk. I thought that was bad then I saw her punches. What is she trying to do? Get the high score at Chuck E’ Cheeses’ Whack –a-mole. Beanstalk gets pissed cuz she realizes she’s fighting a bitch hair puller and just decides to go to town on the hair, she would have made Ready and Red look like a chemo patient if you gave her 2 more minutes.
Fellas, this brings us to the real problem. A problem that didn’t look like a problem at first because it’s Wisconsin, land where the men are men and so are the women. The problem is guys. In this case a guy (1:08). If you’re a man there are 4 reasons, and four reasons only, you stop a chick fight: 1. You don’t stop a chick fight. 2. A chick is lying in a pool of her own blood and feces and may be in coma. 3. The chick is your girlfriend and her vagina and/or mouth is being pounded shut. 4. You don’t stop a chick fight. So, for the guy at 1:08 screw you. Take your dick and nut sack, put those prunes and your baby carrot into a blender, and set that shit to puree. No they’re not gonna fuck you or like you for saving them. All you possibly will get from stopping this fight is a new friend and a shopping date. You only ruined a good “what could have been” when Beanstalk becomes unleashed and Ready in Red realized that piece of steak she just bit off was a little too big and now its stuck in her throat in the form of Beanstalk’s fist.
Seriously though. The only thing chick fights are good for is tits. You don’t believe me? Tell me which is better: the video above or this…
Although I’ve been swamped with end of the Semester projects and Finals next week, I thought I’d throw yall a bone in honor of a great day for Minnesotans tomorrow. Even though I don’t do as much fishing as most of the diehards in Minny, I still thought this video was pretty funny and spot on.
Looks like I finally found my partner for the We Fest Bag Toss Tournament, that is if I can’t get Patrick Kane (see below.) Giroux and I would go ham on anyone, and chicks especially wouldn’t stand a chance having to play in soaking wet panties. Just playin drinkin games with two half-arm casts like it ain’t no thang. Then prolly pounded this duck-faced puck slut in the cornhole like she deserves.
