(WashingtonPost) MADISON, Wis. — Police say a Wisconsin man took the Denny’s restaurant chain slogan “America’s diner is always open” too far, marching into one of the restaurants, announcing he was the new boss and cooking himself dinner.
James Summers walked into a Madison Denny’s on Tuesday dressed in a maroon tie and black trench coat and carrying a briefcase, according to police. He strode into the manager’s office, told her he was the new general manager and then fixed himself a burger, fries and a soda before police arrived.
“This is why you don’t dine and dash, kiddies,” Summers yelled out to diners as officers took him away, police said in a release.
Police found a stun gun in a hip holster under his coat and crack pipes in his briefcase, a criminal complaint showed. Prosecutors charged him Wednesday with disorderly conduct and possession of drug paraphernalia, both misdemeanors, and felony possession of an electronic weapon.
Well… would you expect this to happen in any state other than Wisconsin? You gotta have a solid set of nuts or just be high as fuck to waltz into a restaurant and declare that you are the new General Manager. I bet this manager chick feels like Sherlock fucking Holmes for not falling for the guys crazy scheme… “yeah he told me he was the new Manager… right at that exact moment, I knew something was fishy… because I hadn’t been fired or anything… so I figured I better investigate… although I will admit, I did start packing up my things once I saw him cooking himself dinner…” hell if I were that manager I would have just let the crackhead have a free meal just for attempting something like that… like bravo dude, heres a free cheeseburger for a solid effort, now get the fuck out of my restaurant